Grandfather

July 16th, 2010 § 0

It started off like a normal tea ceremony with everyone gathered round and the parents were served tea by the couple. There were smiles, and words of encouragement, words of prayer. However, it was when the bride’s grandfather sat down that the mood changed. Initially I thought the old man was being slightly ill tempered. I could see his stern face, the years etched into his brow, his mouth sealed. God only knows what he has been through in his years. Whether he had suffered or whether he had rejoiced. He was quiet and seemed to glare down at the bride and groom kneeled down before him. The groom served him tea, and he drank. The bride served him tea, and he drank and he returned the ang bao in turn. And then his mouth turned down at the edges, and his eyes glistened as they brimmed with tears.

The room was quiet at first, watching as the old man began to stretch out his wrinkled, spotted, tired hands over the heads of the two that knelt before him, as if passing a blessing, a mantra, a life from him to them, and slowly lowered them to their shoulders as he embraced them.

I could hear the tears around me as I hesitated to actually press the shutter on my camera, almost ashamed of capturing a moment as beautiful and as precious as this.

To be honest, even to this day I do not know why it was such a sensitive moment. I strongly believe that there are not just tears of happiness in moments like this, but there are tears of sadness as well. That behind all of these layers of humankind in every moment of happiness, there are moments of sadness that cushion every emotion beneath.

To me, what it reflected so clearly was the passing of one life before another. That the grandfather had lived so much, had so many years behind him, while this newly wed couple, were just starting theirs. I do not know where the grandfather’s wife was, perhaps she passed, and perhaps that is what brought those tears, that this ceremony reminded him of his lost love, of the love he once had, of all those years that maybe he should have treasured and loved more. I do not know fully, but I believe that in every happiness there is a reminder of a sadness, and that is what I truly believe is reflected at weddings.

London Office

June 18th, 2010 § 0

I haven’t written much about London solely because I simply haven’t found the time to do do, unfortunately. I guess at some point, I should. Nevertheless, allow me to just mention that the offices in London certainly cater to those with portable devices with lovely long desks aplomb with powerpoints for my use and those of
colleagues. By offices I do mean Starbucks… ah. Joy!

Perspective

June 7th, 2010 § 0

Been a while since I posted, not sure if anyone actually noticed that in the first place anyway!

Anyway. The past few weeks have been busy. I have been trying to finalise all the London photoshoots into draft format so that my couples can go about on the album process, but also have had a variety of all sorts of weddings as well. There was a solemnisation on a park bench which was so cute and sweet and simple, a lunch sitting between the bride and the groom’s father (I seriously had a great discussion with the father!) and the list goes on.

However, amidst the happiness of these events, there was something that moved me close to tears just the other day, and that was a small party of a little five year old girl who has terminal cancer. It’s easy to sometimes let these words just waft over our heads. Day after day after day we hear of the suffering of families, women, children from all over the world. A few hundred dead here, a few thousand there. Numb. In a way it is why they always say that it is the individual stories of people that change things, because when we refer to deaths in numbers, there lacks a personality, there lacks an individual, there lacks a human being that we can see. But that point aside, when I attended, and photographed this little party, with the magic tricks, with the balloons, I really had to hold back my tears. It puts things in perspective. You realise what priorities are, and it certainly makes you question the way you think, how you think, and what you’re going to do about it.

Through The Gauntlet

April 23rd, 2010 § 0

in case you didn’t know I travelled to London today in preparation for some photoshoots which I am actually quite excited about. if you also didn’t know, a volcano in Iceland has been wreaking havoc on European airspace and as such I had been prepared for some delays in Frankfurt, maybe or day, or week even, in the airport. however, quite miraculously all the airports opened up just as my departure date approached and I must confess I felt rather guiltly walking through the gate as all the passengers who had flights booked between the 16th and 20th of
April waited expectantly for a spare seat on my flight. I know that if I had been one of them then I would have demanded that I have priority… but being one who was sauntering casually into the gate with my ticket it certainly is different when you’re on the other side. all I can say is that it’s seriously a logistical nightmare the next few days!

London is cold.

Stranded With Coffee

March 29th, 2010 § 0

I’m halfway through a full day shoot and was processing the express highlights when I decided it was time for a coffee. So, down to the local multinational I went and lo and behold the heavens opened.

I’m not too worried as I have basically completed the highlights with some time to spare, and I’m glad that at least I had a hot cappuccino for company. Sometimes we really don’t have the luxury of such things when we get stranded, but more often than not, if we look around when we are in a bad situation we truly realise that actually we have much more to be thankful for than we had originally realised.

Take a look. Be thankful.

Granted

March 26th, 2010 § 0

I don’t mean to write this as a gloat or boast, but of late, as I look at this start to 2010, I really feel very fortunate at some of the people I have met, and in particular, the couples whom I have had the pleasure and honour of photographing.

In a way I feel that a phtographer in Singapore is not viewed very highly. Please pardon the stereotype but I think most people think of a haggard, poorly dressed guy who mutters under his breath and doesn’t smile much. Sometimes, I am treated accordingly, more or less like a waiter who is at the beck and call of, well, everybody. I don’t really mind being at your service, but I would appreciate an ‘excuse me’ as opposed to a rather curt ‘eh, take photo’.

(Actually this really refers to all service staff in any industry)

However, as I was saying, I really have not felt this way at all with my couples thus far (though honestly, come on, I’m hardly going to out them here anyway! :P ) who have really been so kind and genuine, bringing more to the table than a simple business transaction, and for that I really give thanks. You all know who you are. I guess I’m saying this now because tomorrow I’m shooting an actual day wedding which will be concluding a 4 month relationship with a couple whom I have been honoured to complete a pre wedding and ROM shoot with so far. It’s really something and to have gone from strangers to, well, dare I say, friends, over this time, sharing coffees and teas has been a real joy, and it’s something that I see beginning in many more of my ‘clients’. I really hope that this continues!

Backup

March 23rd, 2010 § 0

I think one of the worst nightmares of anyone with any camera is that moment when you see ‘low battery’ flashing on your screen. It’s literally a pre-empting of your death. Painless perhaps in the physical realm but emotionally? It hurtses us so much.

It’s this pain that definitely you should not expect from your photographer and a service and professionalism which in a way should be taken for granted. I have, however, heard many horror stories from friends about photographers borrowing cameras (yes, borrowing a camera from a guest) which really just makes me shiver.

Office part ii

March 23rd, 2010 § 0

Talking about office space yesterday brings back the everpresent ideas of what kind of space I really want some day. I really love the old two storey shop house idea, although maybe the design on this particular one isn’t fantastic, I think the general idea is there… But oh, the costs, the costs!

Office

March 22nd, 2010 § 0

I don’t have a studio or office as yet, after all I just started full time. So I spend a lot of time outdoors, because honestly I find working at home very distracting. As such, a lot of meetings and other work takes place at the local multinational commercial coffee house that we all love so dearly… :)

Perception

March 18th, 2010 § 0

One of the strange things about life is the concept of perception. There are very few people in this world who simply shrug off the idea of what others perceive about them, and those that do usually do so with a sarcastic slight of hand, which probably is down to wanting to appear different from others anyway, and hence involves changing the perception of themselves to others (confused?). So ultimately, we all do things, to a certain extent, in order to change the perception of what others think of us. As I write this I have my own ideas on how I want this to be perceived.

Or at least that is how I feel about more or less everyone that is around me.

It is this that aggravates me so much when I overhear the conversations of some benign teenagers who want to appear “cool” and what not to their peers. I was sitting in Starbucks yesterday and overheard a couple of rather gormless looking boys talking about girls. One of them uttering highly intelligent phrases like “well, y’know, physical attraction is like a big thing for me” while sticking his finger in his nose and scratching his genitals. The other day I was in McDonalds listening to even more gormless boys talking about “yeah, you know when you try to **** a girl…” which really brought me to question (or not) about what he meant exactly by “try”.

Don’t get me wrong, girls do this as well, it’s just that as a guy, I’ll probably be lambasted and accused of being sexist if I start demeaning teenage girls.

It’s a shame, really, that some people ultimately never grow out of this phase and always think of themselves as somehow superior to those around them, and perception plays a big part in this.

I could really go on about various individuals who have ultimately perceived themselves as something they are not, which can or cannot end in complete embarassment, you can just look on your own Facebook friends list to see those who think they are unbelievably cute, or witty for example, but this disease really extends into the wider world and even to those who are already extremely talented. One such case that jumps to mind is that of Joaquin Phoenix upon his decision to quit acting and start a hip hop career. You can search for the videos on YouTube and it is truly rather disturbing, hilarious, but just downright sad at the end of the day.

The reason I bring this up, really, is because when I go to weddings, meet couples, it can sometimes be extremely disconcerting to witness the extent to which the issue of public perception affects the way things are done. Now, don’t get me wrong, I know that we must respect our elders, our parents, and their wishes, but I really refer more to those peers that are at a wedding. I truly wonder sometimes just how happy are some of these so called friends for the couple, or how enthusiastic individuals are in assisting in the logistics or planning of a wedding. I am no doubt guilty of sometimes having a laissez-faire attitude to the overal proceedings at a friend’s wedding and I think none of us are truly exempt from this sin. Ultimately, it all has to do with perception, and how we feel about this particular event. The pressure that a couple feel at a wedding can truly be overwhelming and sometimes detract from the purpose at hand, which is really quite sad sometimes.

Personalities will always clash, and it’s always easy for individuals to insist on having things done their way even though it’s not their day. Issues like seating arrangements, the order in which things are conducted.

I truly hope that somewhere along the way a couple can always remember who and what they are doing everything for, and that their friends and helpers will remember as well. It is their day, and ultimately, it is their opinion that really matters. Yes, they should care about how they will be perceived, you wouldn’t want to be rude, but at the same time, if you like purple, then it’s okay! If you want to wear a tiara, it’s okay! And if you want to play ridiculously loud rock music at your wedding dinner, it’s okay! It’s your day, after all. Be happy.

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